Okay...gotta recap...(long)

I usually watch DWTS on DVR each season so I can fast forward through all the mumble jumble and commercials. Last night was the first time since half way through the first season I actually watched it live - with commercials and all.

It started and Lil' Kim was first. She was...well...one word...ghettofied. I mean, I think the best line this show has ever had was "The first time I ever watched Dancing With The Stars Was When I Was in Prison". Her "girlfriends" in the Penn told her to be on the show - and how awesome that she is now! :) You know...I actually take it back. The best line in the show was NOT the one I said above, but it was when she said "I am dedicating this first dance to all my girls in the federal detention center". Class act right there! :) Anyways...she dances and is semi-okay. I honestly think her scores were a tad high - but whatever. She does have potential.

Next was Belinda Carlisle. I LOVED the Go-Gos. Oh hell. Did that just date me? At any rate, she did pretty well. She had problems with the spins. I can't fault her for that. When I took dance...I always had problems with spins too! They make you friggen dizzy! The trick is to "spot". I hope he taught her that. I mean EVENTUALLY you are okay with spins...but it takes a while! She did okay. There is room for improvement on her too. Her scores fit how well she did.

Next was Lawrence Taylor and Edyta. Okay. I don't really know who Lawrence Taylor is - other than another NFL player. BUT...I LOVE watching Edyta. I am SO jealous of her body. She is one hot chick! If I could pay for a huge amount of plastic surgery...her body is what I would want to look like! Okay...enough of that. Lawrence Taylor I personally thought did okay. The judges didn't think so. I know there is room for improvement but I think he did decent. Come on...it's his first night!

After him was Steve-O and Lacey. I LOVE Lacey. I love that she is more of a risk-taker and I love that she was paired with Steve-O. Steve-O actually did WAYYYY better than I thought he would. But he was SO stiff and just not good AT ALL. He kept making these silly faces though and I didn't care for his very last move - but that's Steve-O and that's one thing Lacey likes to do with her dances...keep part of the person's personality in it. I was kind of amazed at how horrible his balance was. This guy has circus training and use to walk tightrope. I thought he'd be better. BUT...he was okay. I highly doubt he'll make it to the end unless fans keep him there. But...I don't think he should be the first to go. There is DEFINITE room for improvement.

Next is a guy named Gilles. I missed his last name. He is paired with Cheryl. I missed who he was because I was talking to hubby at the time. Who is this guy? He is nice to look at - but who is he? He dances well - in fact I was quite impressed.

Next up is some country singer named Chuck Wick. (Oh goodness...I probably just got his last name wrong!) At any rate...he is Julianne's real life boyfriend. Hubby and I giggled watching them and came to an agreement that this show is going to cause some big turmoil in their relationship. BUT ya know...they did REALLY well! I was impressed! They dance beautifully together!

Next is Holly Madison. She is replacing Jewel who got hurt during rehearsal. Holly
only has 5 days to prepare for her big debut. To me, she seemed stiff. She seemed unsure of herself. She also seemed a tad annoying when they showed the scenes from rehearsal. Overall I think she did really well for only having 5 days to learn. DEFINITE room for improvement and I think she has it in her. But the one thing I kept thinking the ENTIRE time she danced was..."I wonder if Hef is watching".

Next up Ty Murray - the world famous bull rider. I was SO SURE he was going to be so stiff. He was. But he actually did A LOT better than I thought! There is an obvious mess-up in the middle but they keep on going. But...after the mess-up - he started to get stiffer and stiffer. Must have been the fear. Overall, he did good. I was impressed! I don't think he'll make it to the end but I think he did well! But...I think he got the first 4 I have ever seen on that show. Ouch.

Next is a gold medal winner for gymnastics - Shawn Johnson. She is the youngest DWTS performer yet. I missed her age though. Again, talking to the hubby. They do well. I kept looking at her back and shoulders and kept thinking they were HUGE. I knew that was from being so muscular. But I still thought they were huge. They have great potential and I think she'll go far.

Next up is Steve Wozniak - co-founder of Apple. He can't dance. BUT I love him! His attitude ROCKS. I think the show purposely teamed him with Karina SmirnoffIce because she is...well...a bitch. I DO NOT like Karina one bit. I remember in one season - the one with Joey Lawrence...they were interviewing him after his dance and she sat back there rolling her eyes and shaking her head. Hated her since then. She seems so annoying. Anyways. He was not a good dancer at all - but I found myself rooting for him! His personality is so awesome and that is just inspiring! I have a feeling he may be the first to go... :(

David Alan Grier is up next. He is one funny guy. His partner doesn't get his jokes at first but he kept me laughing. I actually thought he did great! I agreed with the judges that his face had wayyyy too many expressions. But I think he has great potential! I think his scores were lower than he deserved.

Denise Richards is next. I am jealous she gets to dance with the sexiness known as Maks. He literally is so beautiful - although I didn't like the chia pet on his face. But Denise Richards...not a fan. I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt when they showed her. She kept messing up and kept saying "Sorry". Maks tells her to stop saying sorry. She cries. Seriously? Cries???? Damn...quit crying. Even Maks couldn't believe she cried. Her dance sucked. She has no rhythm. I don't see her going very far. Maybe the viewers will have sympathy on her because she cried. Who knows.

Last is Melissa - the girl that got dumped on the Bachelor. If you haven't heard about it, you must have been living under a rock. I don't watch the show - but even I heard about it! At any rate...I was annoyed she was on there. I was under the impression she was never going to do reality tv again. She lied. She then only had 48 hours to prepare. I was certain it would be a train wreck. She looks really pretty - but I am not so sure what the glitter thing on her back was. It reminded me of a tramp stamp. Hmmm. Anyways - she dances and I am actually blown away. She did SO GOOD! I COULD NOT believe how great she was with only 48 hours to learn and not having dance experience. Oh. That's right. She does. She was a Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader and has ballet training. Hmmm. Is that even fair??? But - I must admit. She ended up being one of my favorites! I may just be on Team Melissa this year! We shall see! :)

So...did any of you watch it??? What did you think??