Friday, May 29, 2009

It's Over...

School is FINALLY over! YAYYYYY!!!!!!!!!! :) It's been a longggggggg week. It's been a hellish past two days. But tonight...I am a FREE woman!! Hubby is at work. Munchkin is asleep. I am going to go sit and read a book I have been dying to get into and just RELAX! :) It's been a long time since I have done that and I think I am entitled! :)

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Pullin' My Hair Out...

I see the light. The light at the end of the tunnel. It looks like I have to travel through a whole bunch of crap (I am picturing Shawshank Redemption as he is escaping) but once I get through it...the light will be there. The freedom will be there.

What I am referring to is hell week. Finals week. Sorry I haven't blogged much but I am trying to remember everything I learned throughout the semester. It's amazing how much you forget from test to test and day to day.

TWO MORE DAYS PEOPLE. That's it. Final tomorrow. Final Friday. THEN FREEDOM!!! I will get my life back. I will be able to spend quality time with the munchkin. I will be able to spend quality time with the hubby. I will be able to spend quality time with friends and family! I CAN'T WAIT.

But I must go through a few more days of pure hell until I get there! GOOD NEWS is...I should be done with the majority of my schooling by the end of the Spring Semester. Then it's wait to see if I get accepted to the next phase. That wait list is almost TWO years long. But I am going to look at my options and see what other schools don't have such a huge wait list.

I am SO EXCITED for this next phase in my life!!! But moreso...I am just more excited for 1:00 to come on Friday and then I am a FREE WOMAN!!!!

Okay...done to study...

Wednesday, May 20, 2009


Nothing new to really report - which I guess is why there is a lack in blogging.

I have been SUPER busy with school. It seems the closer we get to the last day (May 29th...which is 8 days, 23 hours from now) I am bombarded with more work. I am counting down the hours and minutes though! It will be GREAT to be out for a while!

Which I guess poses another problem. I am due in December with munchkin number two and the fall semester will end right when I am due. I am hoping there is someway I can squeeze school in and a baby out next semester but I am not too sure how that will work. We shall see!

I am feeling like crap lately. Morning sickness is allllllllllllllll day sickness. It sucks. I am not necessarily throwing up anymore (well, here and there I do) but I am super nauseated all day and will gag over anything. I will be 10 weeks on Saturday. The munchkin seems to laugh at me as I gag while changing a poopy diaper. She then will mimic me. Nice. She takes after her dad that's for sure! LOL!

Emily continues to amaze me every single day. It's so amazing how smart she is. Not only can she count to 10 (well, sometimes to 15) but she knows her abcs too. She sometimes gets ABCDE mixed up (it will be ABEDC) but she knows the rest of it. I think that is awesome for only 20 months! She LOVES to read (today I think I read 4390580245820538 books with her thus far) and she has memorized some that she "reads" back. Her favorite thing to ask lately is "what's that?" as she points to something. You will tell her what it is and she will say "look at the ____!" It's funny. But's an ALL DAY LONG thing! :) She also asks "What are you doing" alllll day long too. As repetitive as it is, it is super cute too!

Erik has been working working working working working. He's been on shift since Saturday, has today off, then back on shift until Monday night. I miss him and Emily misses him too.

So all in all that is what has been going on. Nothing too exciting! :)

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

I Get It...

I have had A LOT of support when people have found out I am expecting. I had lots of hugs, some tears, tons of congrats and just overall love. It's truly such a wonderful feeling when people are just as excited as you are about a new life coming into this world!

But why is it when you DO have good news - there are those few that aren't happy for you. I mean, I get going through crappy times and I get stress and whatever else. But why is that some people can't just be happy for others? Why must there always be a few to rain on your parade?

I had a few people express to me their "thoughts" on me being pregnant. So, to "answer" their concerns, which may be concerns of others who didn't open their mouth, I will do so here.

1. You better hurry up and potty train Emily. It's going to be so hard to have two kids in diapers. Plus, don't you think you are having two too close together?

No, I don't think they are too close in age. In fact, I think it's a GREAT spread in age. As far as the potty training, it will happen when it does. I am not going to force my daughter to do something she isn't ready for yet, at 20 months, just because it will make MY life better. But don't you worry, we are introducing her to it right now. It just isn't going to happen tomorrow. It will happen when she's ready.

2. I can't believe you are doing this right in the middle of school. School is going to get harder and harder and you should have waited. You probably aren't going to go back. You CAN'T forget about school.

I understandstand school is difficult. I also understand it will get worse the more advanced classes I take. I also understand that this new baby will slow me down a semester or two. I understand the person who said this is having a difficult time in school because this person is more advanced in classes than I am, plus this person is working her butt off with two jobs. I know they are working their ass off and I know they will be SO successful at the end of their journey and I am so EXCITED for this person to reach their goal! But you know what else I understand, I also understand that I have a GREAT support team. I have a great husband who can be flexible with his job. I have great family and friends always willing to help. Sure, I will be tired. Sure I will be stressed. Sure I will probably cry when overworked. But, I can do this. I WILL do this. I believe in myself 110% - which is a hell of a lot more than some people believe in me. But to me, all that matters is that I am doing this for ME. I am making a change for the better. I am making a change that will benefit my family. I truly believe that anything WORTHWHILE takes a lot of hard work. I am committed to this journey.

3. I knew it...but you and your husband have a crappy relationship, is it so smart to be having another child?

THIS is the one that pissed me off the most. First and foremost, my husband and I have a GREAT relationship. He is my best friend. Sure, we argue. Show me ONE couple that do not get annoyed with each other. Show me ONE couple that has never had a disagreement. Show me ONE couple that hasn't had a fight. I will be the first to say it. We fight. We disagree. We get annoyed with one another. JUST because we do that does NOT mean we have a crappy marriage or relationship. I couldn't be MORE excited to be doing this with HIM. He is an EXCELLENT father who continues to amaze me and I am so honored to call him my husband. We've been through rough patches. We have been through big fights. We have been through a lot even before we got married. But we made it through. We grew together. We loved each other. We respected each other. We are at where we are now and I think it's pretty damn exciting. I understand the reasons this person may have said this. I undertand what they are going through in their life. But it doesn't mean because I vented to them twice about an argument with hubby that our marriage is crap. I guess I learned I REALLY can't trust too many people with things. You would THINK I would have learned that by now. But alas, I still haven't fully grasped it.

But at any rate. I am happy. I am excited. I am content. I don't think I have been happier in my life. This journey we are on is exciting. Sure it's stressful. Sure it's scary. But I know it's going to be amazing! :) And...I guess...what it REALLY comes down to is what is RIGHT for hubby and I. No one else. This is OUR journey. No one else's.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Thank you Mom...

I thought of using "mom" since Mother's Day was just here and I thought it would be a perfect time to be thankful for her...

1. I am thankful my mom gave all she could to both my brother and I. My parents are divorced, they divorced when I was 4 or 5 and she raised us, working her butt off, giving us everything we needed.

2. I am thankful she taught me the importance of giving, the importance of forgiving and the importance of unconditional love.

3. I am thankful she allowed me my freedom growing up and because of that, I was a good kid.

4. I am thankful she was there for every single thing. She was there for school plays, school concerts, baton competitions, dance recitals, gymnastic classes. She was there for all the important things and I am so grateful for that.

5. I am thankful she taught me the importance of having to do things you don't necessarily want to do.

6. I am thankful she instilled in me the importance of family.

7. I am thankful she encouraged me, laughed with me, cried with me, and disciplined me.

8. I am thankful she even was there through my crazy New Kids On The Block fascination and drove me to concerts and helped us make signs and banners. (Yes...I totally DID just admit that! LOL!)

9. I am thankful she was there for the birth of my precious daughter and will be there for the birth of our next child.

10. I am thankful that not only is she my mother, but she is my friend. I am truly blessed to know such a wonderful woman. Every day she amazes me. Every day she inspires me. But most importantly...every day she is MY mom and I couldn't be more blessed!

Now tell me about that person in your life...whether your mom or someone else. :)

Thankful Tuesday...

Welcome to Thankful Tuesday! I hope you will take the time to participate this week! It is a great feeling to stop and reflect on all the things you are thankful for! It can do wonders for a bad mood and can do wonders to remind you of the little things that sometimes we all take for granted!

So for this week's assignment...

Your topic is:

So what you do is simple...

1. Post a new blog listing ten things that you are thankful for in regards to this week's topic! Feel free to do more than 10!

2. Be sure to link my blog somewhere in your post. (Shameless plug...I know!)

3. Come back later on in the day (after I have posted my post (which will probably be some time around 10 California time)) and sign Mr. Linky that will be at the bottom of my post. This will let everyone know you have participated.

4. Leave a comment for the person that signed above you (or if you are first, leave a comment for me).

5. If you are feeling generous, leave a comment for at least 3 people...or even more!

That's it! :) Pretty simple! Now get to work!

Monday, May 11, 2009

The REAL truth to my hiatus...

So yes, I have been gone on a hiatus for a bit. Yes, I have had A LOT going on. Yes, school has been kicking my ass.

But the REAL reason for it all is right here:

Yes...that is our new little bean to be! :) I am only 8 weeks along and although I know it's taboo to tell before your 12th week, I just couldn't wait anymore. Well, that and the fact my waistline has grown and I look like I have gained A LOT of weight. I am not "showing" but I sure have thickened up. Today was the first day of wearing my old maternity jeans. I guess it's true...with the second child you show A LOT quicker. :(

I cried when I put on my maternity pants today. They are a huge pain in the ass. Since I am not "big" yet, I also have to wear my bella band and it's just a pain all the way around. BUT...before too long I am sure I can do without it.

I would have felt really bad if I had continued blogging during the hiatus because I would have felt like I was keeping secrets from all of you. I have even kept distance from my mom and friends just because I am a pretty honest person and to not be honest about this is a hard thing for me to do.

But now the secret is out! The little bean is healthy and is due December 19th. We had our first ultrasound when I was 6 weeks, 4 days along and they could not find the heartbeat. I was pretty scared and pretty anxious but as of Friday, it was there. We even got to hear it on the ultrasound!

I have been EXHAUSTED and sick off and on. I am usually in bed by 9 - TOPS. But other than the total and complete exhaustion and the bouts of barfing or feeling like I have to, I am so excited!!!

So we are plugging along. House hunting. Baby growing. Just doing wonderful!

I will be here more regularly since I am able to be honest with all of you now!

It's good to be back!