Thursday, October 30, 2008

My Writing Assignment...

Back again for this week's assignment from Mama Kat! I love doing these things!

So this week my prompts were:

1.) Write from the point of view of a glass at the edge of the table.

2.) Describe a typical day during your Jr. High years.

3.) Why do you write?

4.) When I'm around too much negativity I...

5.) You've been hired as a writer for "Late Show with David Letterman." Your first assignment is to come up with a witty, nonpolitical Top Ten list for him to read on air.

Now I must admit all of them intrigued me! I had a hard choice this week. But...I am going to go with number 3!

The reason I started this blog is keep everyone updated on our family. I was usually emailing updates every so often, attaching a billion pictures of the munchkin, and then sending them out. Some people couldn't open some of the pictures, or they were too big, or whatever. So I started the blog to make it easier on me. Selfish? Maybe. But I am a new mommy and I don't have the time to email a hundred different people and then resize pictures and send again!

But now this blog has turned into a little more than just solely being about family. Sure, I still give family updates, but now I throw in a lot more information about myself. It gives people a chance to get to know me! If I were to pass tomorrow, people would have this blog to read and learn a little more about me. Sure, that sounds morbid, but it's true. That isn't the main reason I write, but that is one advantage to it. If something were to happen to me today, Emily would have this blog to read and keep close to her to always have her mommy around. She would know my love for her and she would get to know a little bit about me. Like I said, that isn't the reason why I write...but I am not going to lie and say it hasn't crossed my mind.

I have found that writing is a form of therapy for me. If I am having a bad day, I can come here and blog and I usually feel better afterwards. I like these assignments because it makes me think and gives people a little glimpse into who I am!

My step-mom recently told me that she couldn't believe all the private things I have written about. She was basically referring to the post about my 10 biggest fears. She said the things were so personal that I wrote and wanted to make sure I was comfortable enough in sharing them to the world. Honestly, I didn't think twice about writing them. I don't think that I would write anything on here that I wouldn't share in person to someone...even a complete stranger. Perhaps some things are personal...but like I said, it gives everyone a very tiny glimpse into who I am so I don't mind sharing! I like when people can be open and honest about themselves and I am finding that this once very shy person is now starting to be someone that can share things...even if it is only written out in a blog!

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

A Nice Walk On A Saturday...

Sorry I haven't blogged in quite some time! I have had a lot going on and have been busy lately.

Saturday I was able to get out of the house with the munchkin and some friends and we decided to walk the Golden Gate Bridge again. Well...again for me...for my friend Trina and her daughter, it was their first time.

As you may remember, I was a bit freaked out on the last trip. This time was MUCH easier. I still wouldn't look over the railing, or even come close to it, but I was able to look out and enjoy the view! It was a great, inexpensive, fun thing to do on a Saturday! I highly recommend it to anyone!

What cute glasses...

That ended up here...

Friday, October 24, 2008

Fun Photo Friday!

I have been really lax on uploading pictures lately! So are going to have picture overload!

Enjoy! :)

Pumpkin Patchin' It...

Taken from my cell...

Emily sitting on mommy's pumpkin!

Grandma Alma and Grandpa John...


Pumpkins as far as the eyes can see...

And fun at the park...

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Darcie tagged me and I am tagging you!

Darcie tagged me to do the following and since I am sucker for these things...I figure why not!

Now I may not have 7 people to send it to but I will at least include some of you! :)

So 7 random facts about little ol' me:

1. I have really bad knees. I have had surgery on both knees in order to stop them from dislocating. My knee caps sit up too high and slant off to the side which makes me a prime target for them to dislocate. They have dislocated walking across the street, running up a hill, dancing, and doing gymnastics. I have lost count how many times it has happened. They have "subluxated" (meaning gone out and back in) from putting on panty hose, stepping wrong, and just everyday walking. Again, I have lost count on how many times that has happened. IT'S ANNOYING. They haven't dislocated in a long time but they still subluxate. I have had to deal with the pain from one surgery (that I got in 1988) for years. The second surgery (done in 2003) was a breeze and it is AMAZING to me how advanced the surgical procedure got. In 1988 I was in the hospital for 2 weeks and rehab for months. In 2003 I was out on the dance floor meeting my husband 2 weeks after the surgery! In my left knee (the one done in 1988) I can tell you when the weather is changing (which if I have it right should be in the next few days) and I can just be sitting on the couch when it swells for no reason. Fun times!

2. I am NOT a fruit/veggie person. I haven't been for most of my life. Amazingly I have very low cholesterol and am really regular (not like you need to know that!). I am more healthy than some people that I know that do partake in fruits and veggies on a regular basis. The older Emily gets the more I am going to change this horrible horrible habit of mine...but I know it won't be easy for me! The weird thing is...I have a cousin who is EXACTLY the same...but a little worse than I am!

3. I squint. I think I got that habit from my dad because he does it too. I squint when I am tired (and just caught myself doing right now). I squint when I am bored. I squint when I am thinking. It looks like a smile but not like MY smile (if that makes sense).

4. I love ABBA. Yes...I love Dancing Queen. Yes, I love Take a Chance on Me. Yes, I love every single song they sing. Again, I think I got that from my dad. I also think I know almost every single song of theirs by heart.

5. I am hair-incompetent. The only way I know how to do my hair is down or pulled into a bun/pony-tail contraption. If I am going out, I wear my hair down 100% of the time. If I am at home or running a super-quick errand, then I will pull all my hair back. I wish I knew how to curl my hair so it's cute or pull it up into some sort of fancy something-or-other. I wish I knew how to even pull my hair back for casual wear in something OTHER than a bun/pony-tail contraption, but I don't.

6. My second toe is longer than my big toe. It's hereditary on my mom's side.

7. I love to read. It's weird...the older I get, the more I enjoy it. Right now I am out of books to read! I can't believe it! But...I know what my next book is that I want to read. I will be purchasing it SOON. I find it VERY hard to read fiction books and usually enjoy non-fiction. The ONLY fiction I have read in years and years has been Jodi Piccoult. I now REALLY like her and will be purchasing another one of her books for my next read. But...if it were not for her...I would strictly be reading non-fiction. It is REALLY hard for me to get into a fiction book! :)

Now...I am tagging some people. I doubt I will be able to tag 7 of you so forgive me! These are in no particular order!

First...I am tagging Trina. She is new to the blogging world and I want to help her establish her blog as best I can! :)

Second...Kimmy. She likes things like this and I think she'll have fun with it!

Third would be Serenity/ I also think she'd like doing this.

Fourth is Mimi. I love reading her blog and am curious of what she has to say!

So that's it. Just four people! Hope you all participate! :)

Another Assignment...

Back for my weekly writing assignment from Mama Kat.

My prompts this week:

1.) Complete the sentence "I'd walk a mile for a ________." and continue writing about it.

2.) Describe in detail a person who leaves no stone unturned.

3.) When out to lunch with co-workers, you bump into a close friend who refers to you by a nickname. Because of its unusualness, the nickname catches the interest of one of your co-workers who asks for the story behind it. Start your story with, "This may come as a surprise, but ... " and end it with, "And that's how I got the nickname (fill in the blank)."

4.) Write about an intense game of Scrabble that takes an ugly turn for the worse.


When I saw the prompts I knew which one I'd go with and I chose the first one.

So here goes:

I would walk a mile for...well...I would walk ten-thousand miles (with breaks of course) to find a cure for cancer. I have lost too many family members and friends from this terrible terrible disease. I personally know people battling it right now and I also know survivors.

Did you know that approximately 1500 people die EACH day from this disease? Did you know that approximately 3400 people are diagnosed with cancer EACH day? That is such an alarming rate and I can only hope and pray that they find a cure. I would DEFINITELY walk one mile or a million miles to help battle this disease.

As some of you may know, October is breast cancer awareness month. I know a lot of my readers are female and I want to urge all of you that are old enough, to get your mammies grammed! I know it's not on your list of fun things to do - but it is important!!! For those that don't meet the age requirement for a mammogram, I want to urge you to do self-examination. Testing regularly is the best way for women to lower their risk of dying from breast cancer. Screening tests can find breast cancer early, when it’s most treatable. Early detection is key!

My heart and prayers go out to everyone who has battled this disease and who is still battling it. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think of my loved ones that I lost to this disease. I can only hope and pray that SOMEDAY we find a cure!

Thursday, October 16, 2008

YOU are worth living for

WARNING: This post is about suicide. If you have lost someone to suicide and think you will find this post too difficult to read, please click out of it now. If you are contemplating suicide or know someone who may be, I encourage you to keep reading.

With that being said...

I love Dr. Phil. I admit, I am one of *those* that actually like him. I think he's real in what he says and he lays it out for you - whether you are ready to hear it or not. I appreciate that in someone and feel we can all learn from someone like that.

The other night his show was about suicide. He mentioned the movie The Bridge. It is about a guy who set up cameras in 2004 and recorded the happenings at the Golden Gate Bridge. Twenty-four people committed suicide that year. My sister in law had told me about it previously and I don't know why it intrigued me, but it did. So I watched it.

It made me so sad because all the people that committed or attempted suicide (one guy survived the jump) left behind people that loved them so much. Life is ALWAYS worth living for. ALWAYS. No matter what you are going through, no matter what anyone goes through that committs suicide, there is NEVER anything that is *that bad* that is worth ending your life. There is ALWAYS help available. There is ALWAYS a light at the end of the tunnel. There is ALWAYS someone that will be there for you. The situation that seems so bleak and horrible in the moment is NEVER as bad as it seems right then.

I have personally known two people that have taken their own life. One did it over a guy breaking up with her. It's so sad. She was so young. She would have gotten through it and what seemed so horrible at the time would have gotten better, she would have healed, she would have moved on to bigger and better things. We all do when our heart is broken. The other person I knew, no one knows why he did it. No note. No problems that anyone knew of. Nothing.

I want to encourage all of you if you know someone who has joked around about suicide or has talked about it...PLEASE listen to them.

Here are some warning signs to really pay attention to:

  • Threatening to hurt or kill oneself or talking about wanting to hurt or kill oneself

  • Looking for ways to kill oneself by seeking access to firearms, available pills or other means

  • Talking or writing about death, dying or suicide when these actions are out of the ordinary for the person

  • Feeling hopeless

  • Feeling rage or uncontrolled anger, or seeking revenge

  • Acting reckless or engaging in risky activities, seemingly without thinking

  • Feeling trapped, like there's no way out

  • Increasing alcohol or drug use

  • Withdrawing from friends, family and society

  • Feeling anxious, agitated or unable to sleep, or sleeping all the time

  • Experiencing dramatic mood changes

  • Seeing no reason for living, or having no sense of purpose in life

What to Do if You See Warning Signs:

  • Take the person seriously and realize that he or she is not joking but is telling you his or her plans.

  • Call 911.

  • If the danger is imminent, reach out for help by calling a suicide crisis line such as the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK(8255).

  • Encourage the person to seek mental help.

  • Don't give up on the person. Check in with him or her constantly. Let the person know that you want him or her to be safe and well, and that professional treatment is the best way to do that.

You can also find help online by going here

If you are contemplating suicide...PLEASE get help. PLEASE speak to someone. You are NOT alone. People care about you. People want you around. People need you. I want you around. I care about you. PLEASE click on the link above if you need help or call 1-800-273-TALK(8255) just to talk to someone. Please. YOU are so worth living for...even if it doesn't feel that way now. YOU are worth so much!

Sorry for the downer post but if I could save just one's worth it.

Weekly Assignment

So for this weeks assignment there will not be a list of 10 things! :) These were my prompts this week:

1.) Recall a time when you did something to get noticed. Write about it.

2.) Begin with “I wish someone told me…”

3.) If you could rearrange three things about your life what would they be?

4.) What do you love to create?

Although I could do all of them, I will go with number 4.

What do I love to create?

For answer, after a few seconds of that I love to create togetherness. With togetherness comes memories. I think there is nothing more special, more memorable, more wonderful than having everyone you love together to celebrate a birthday, an anniversary, a holiday or just because.

Maybe it's this time of year that has me all warm and fuzzy thinking about everyone getting together over the holidays? I don't know. But I love having get togethers not just at this time of the year, but all year long. I have a very strong sense of family and I want to be sure to pass that on to my daughter. I think it's important. Family and friends are what keep us going in difficult times. Family and friends are there to lift you up when you are down, make you laugh until you just about pee your pants, and tell you that you are screwing up when you are!

Now don't get me wrong...I don't advocate for having "togetherness" all the time. Alone time is very much needed. But getting together with family and friends for a special occasion, or even a just-because occasion is something I just LOVE! :)

I think being together and having that family bond is important. Life is SO short and if you don't take the time to get together and create memories now, you may end up regretting it later. I can only sit here and wish I had spent more time with my dad's father. Sure, I saw him, but wasn't as close as I should have been to my grandfather. We had get-togethers, but only once a year. That isn't enough. I should have made more of an effort. The same goes for my mom's dad. I can only wish that I knew him. I knew of him, I visited him a few times, but I didn't KNOW him, if you know what I mean. I can't go back and fix that now. I wish I had those memories. I wish I could show Emily a picture of both my grandfathers and tell her stories, but I can't because I don't have many to share. I can tell her maybe one or two, but I don't have my own special memories of them. I DO NOT want that for her and refuse to allow that to happen. She WILL know her grandparents and she will be able to pass on stories to her children of them. The same goes for all her aunties (even the ones that are non-blood related), uncles and cousins too!

The one thing I always try to tell people is to remember that life is so short and if you have some amends that need to be made to your family or friends...make them now. Get together for the holidays. Bridge the gap. Love. Show up. And create your memories. You'll be glad you did!

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

For my husband...

Dear Sweetheart...

It was nice to get to talk to you earlier! I am glad you are not doing too much today other than sitting in front of Cedric the Entertainer and Smokey Robinson's houses making sure they don't catch on fire! I hope you can sneak a picture or two in of one of their houses...preferably Smokeys! :) You know how I love my Motown!

I am praying that the winds don't shift like they are predicting which will cause you guys to work. I know you WANT work...but for my peace of mind...I don't want you to! I'd rather you just do structure protection with no flames around! I know that's ludicrous but like I said, for my peace of mind, that's what I want! :)

I saw on the news how the fire grew from 3,000 acres to 10,000 overnight. I saw how there is 0% containment and no containment date in sight. I hope you come home soon! I already miss you even though you'd normally be on shift today! I guess there is something about you being all the way in Los Angeles and not in the next town that makes me miss you more!

I wish you were here to see our baby girl walking. You mentioned you couldn't see the videos I sent but were able to see it on the blog! I am uploading another video I took just for you to see her in action today! She hasn't mastered standing on her own so I have to help her with that but as you can see, she's figuring out the steps more! Sometimes she steps sideways like she is going around the coffee table but that's okay! She's doing it on her own! I CAN'T WAIT for you to see it in person!

At any rate, here is the video. I hope you can see it!

I miss you and I love you. PLEASE be safe. I don't know what I'd do without you! I know you are with a good crew and I had a big sigh of relief when you said that Jim was with you too. I hope you get some rest tonight! I hope like all the other strike teams they will put you in a hotel rather than in the tents. But, if they do put you in the tents, I hope you sleep. I hope you start to feel better soon too! All three of us are hanging onto this cold thing. It's about time we get rid of it!

Well I love you, I hope to talk to you soon. PLEASE be safe. Come home soon! Emily and I will be sure to say extra prayers for you and all the firefighters down there with our nightly prayers!

Love you forever...

Your wifey

I was interviewed!!

Wendy over at Adoption and Fire came up with a fun idea to let all of us out there in blog-land get to know one another!

She interviewed me with the following questions in which I am supplying my answers:

1. Has being married to a firefighter changed your outlook on life and how you see the world?

In a way it has. Every time Erik leaves for work there is that tiny bit of fear that he may not come home again. I always make sure to tell him I love him and to be careful. Growing up you always think of the firefighter as the hero and, I know for me at least, I never thought about that wife (or husband) at home. I never realized what they must go through as well. I actually blogged about being a firefighter's wife a while ago and I just read the post again and that pretty much sums up how I feel. I have learned not to take things for granted because who knows if Erik will come home again after each time he goes to work. I have learned that holidays are just days and can be celebrated on a different day than the rest of the world celebrates. I have learned not to take things for granted. I realize I don't tell him enough how much I appreciate him and I am working on that because I appreciate him more than he will ever know!

I am now personally affected each time I hear of a line-of-duty death whether it is a firefighter, police officer or military personnel. Prior to knowing Erik, I wouldn't even think twice about it. Sure, it is always sad to hear of someone dying in their chosen profession, but literally hits VERY close to home. This morning on the news I was watching the procession for a fallen police officer and at one point they passed the firefighters who had hung a flag 7 stories up and stood saluting the police officers as they passed. I literally had goosebumps and was in tears. Prior to being with Erik, I don't think it would have affected me that way. In fact, I know it wouldn't.

2. Do you think you parent differently because you are married to a firefighter?

I am not quite sure how to answer this since I am a first-time mommy and she was born while Erik was a firefighter? In a way I guess I do parent a little differently than those not married to civil servants. By that I mean that for a minimum of 48 hours a week I am a single mom. Now don't get me wrong, he is very much a part of her life, but for those 48 hours (which lately has been 72 or so) I am the one bathing her, feeding her, putting her down for a nap, changing the poopy diapers, running the errands with her, and doing everything by myself. I am NOT complaining - I LOVE being a mommy...but for 2-3 days a week I do it by myself without help. If I am sick, I am here doing it alone. If I have things that I need to get done for myself, sometimes those get put off until he gets off shift.

I also do my best to keep him home when he's at work. By that I mean that I made a book of pictures of just Erik and Emily and I will read it to her so "Dada" is close. We will call him and talk to him and sometimes go and visit him after 5 at work. When we say our prayers at night we always include daddy in them too. I am not sure if that is any different than others do but that is just what we do!

3. I might have missed this post, but how did you come up with the name of your blog?

If any of you want to read my very first post that talks about how I came up with the name of the blog, you can read it here. However, it's a pretty long post so I will sum it up right here:

When I came up with the idea of doing a blog I was stumped for names of what to call it. I didn't want to use our last name. I wanted something unique. I was staring at the pictures scrolling across the screensaver when this picture came up:

Emily LOVED to play with spoons when we were out at a restaurant (and still does sometimes) and she'd always giggle or laugh and just have a GREAT time with a spoon. I wanted to use "playing with spoons" but it was taken so I thought "laughing with spoons" went hand-in-hand and I used that! :).

So now it's your turn to play along!! I would love to interview you! If you have a blog and you would like for me to interview you, I will leave a question or two for you in the comment section of this post. Once your questions have been posted, you will then create a blog post on your blog with the answers to said question(s). I agree with Wendy and think this would be a fun way to get to know you even better! If you are game for an interview, leave me a comment to let me know and then come back to check what your question(s) are

Monday, October 13, 2008



I know I mentioned she walked before when I posted about it previously but that was only one or two steps. She has done NOTHING since that time...until today!

Earlier at my mom's, she was able to accomplish this:

Of course I took a bazillion videos of it but the one I am sharing here is her walking the farthest!

The video isn't the best because it was taken from my camera phone but you better believe you have ONE PROUD MOMMA right here!!!!

I only wish Erik was here! :( I was able to tell him and send him an email of the above video that I hope he'll be able to retrieve.

He is currently on his way to Los Angeles on a strike team again. No telling when they will be back. If you are interested in reading more about it, feel free to click here.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE pray for him and all the other thousands of firefighters and other civil servants out there. It's always a scary time for me when he has to go on a strike team, but this is the furthest he has had to go. I trust him and I trust his crew, but I can't help but worry!

Saturday, October 11, 2008

Take Two Prenatals and Call Me In the Morning...

On Thursday the 9th my wonderful friends Trina, Val and I made our way to Sacramento to watch our long anticipated New Kids on the Block concert!

The evening started with Trina and I picking up Val and then hitting the road. We stopped at Sonic for dinner and then headed over to the Arco Arena for the concert. We were so stoked because our seats were AWESOME! How we got center stage, floor, 11 rows back is beyond me! But ticketmaster LOVED us that day and gave them to us!

(yes it says row L but since there is not a row "I" - we are 11 rows back!)

We were all giddy like the 13 year old girls of the past...but this time we got to tailgate! :)

Yes we wore glow necklaces and bracelets

The inevitable shoe shot

We had a lot of fun tailgating!! I think my stomach hurt super bad and I had tears streaming down my face from laughing so hard after this (hope you don't mind Val!):

We made our way inside to wait for the concert to start. But of course...without taking a billion or so pictures!

(obviously we were starting to feel the alcohol!)

View of stage from our seats

Then it started...

Natasha Bedingfield was first. She was GREAT! I did snap some pictures (we had to use our phones as no cameras were allowed) but I had to delete them because I had too many stored! Obviously NKOTB came first on the list of priorities before Natasha. Sorry Natasha!!!

And then they came out...

I immediately transformed into that teenager of years ago. All of us did!! We sang, or more like we screamed...we danced, we laughed, we jumped up and down! I was certain that each of them saw us jumping up and down in our glow-gear. It was a GREAT concert and WAYYYY better than I remember in my younger years!

After the concert, we were pretty tired, hot and sweaty from jumping up and down and screaming like teenagers, and very hungry.

We stopped and got some food and then made our way home...dropped Val off...took 2 prenatals (they get rid of ANY sort of hangover) and then Trina and I went home.

It was SO MUCH fun and I definitely made memories to last a lifetime...after all...those are the best memories to have!! :)

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Don't Go Off To College With Baby Food...

So I am back again for my weekly assignment from Mama Kat. I tend to usually pick the ones that require me to write about 10 things and this week is no exception!

So I am writing about my 10 biggest fears. These are in no particular order.

1. Death. The thought of losing someone I love is very scary to me. I know it's a part of life but I can't bare to think of someone that I love not being a part of my life. I just recently experienced that with my grandmother and I miss her so much every single day. I think about how we are all getting older and how Emily will lose her grandparents, her aunts and uncles and then her own parents. I fear losing my husband, and worse, I fear losing my child. I also fear death for myself. I don't fear being gone but I fear those left behind being in pain. I wouldn't want that. I would want them to carry me close to their heart and remember the good times, but I definitely wouldn't want them to be distraught or sad.
(this is the cemetery a lot of my family is buried in)

2. Heights. I hate heights. Maybe I should put it as my fear of falling because truly that is what it is. I fear falling from some place high and just the thought of it gives me on to the next one...

3. Ants. Yes I know, that is ridiculous - but it's true. I don't mind one or two ants but when they bring all their friends for a party in MY house...I ain't havin' it! And...if after they had their party in my house and they are all killed and gone and I spot just one little scout - I will FREAK OUT. True story. I am not posting a picture of ants because they freak me out that much...instead I will post one of my friend:

4. The Economic Crisis. Sure, we will bounce back from our current state, but when and at what costs? I worry about my family's future. I worry what all this will mean. Being in debt is not a fun situation and I hope that we can see some change for everyone VERY soon!

5. Failure. I am fearful of failing in any aspect of my life. Recently I have been feeling like a failure. I have gone from being a full-time business owner to a stay-at-home mom (for the most part). My business went from being successful enough to pay the bills at the office, pay the bills at home and keep money in my pocket to do things. Now, I make enough just to keep the doors open. It feels like a huge failure on my part but I know I am doing what I need to do for now. It's been a VERY hard thing for me to go through and I am still trying to find my spot. I don't want to admit defeat with my business because I am fearful that means I am a failure. I have never felt "failure" hit so close to home as it hits me now.

6. Change. So with the above-mentioned information about failure, I also fear change. I fear finding a new career - one that can keep me at home some of the time and at work for the other part of the time. I have ALWAYS had a huge problem with change and I try to avoid it at all costs. It scares me. Sure, I know change is a GOOD thing a lot of the times...but that doesn't mean I have to like it! :)

7. Motherhood. Now I don't fear being a mom, I just fear that I am not being a good-enough mom. I fear that my decisions and my actions will land Emily in therapy when she is older and will cause her a lot of pain. I fear that maybe she will grow up unhappy. I fear that I am doing everything wrong. All I know is I love her so very much, more than life itself. I just fear that may not be enough!

8. Car accidents. With this being said, I have a fear being in a car with someone driving other than me. I apologize to all those I have ridden with (you especially dear husband) and have been a nervous wreck. It isn't YOUR driving I don't like, it's the fear of other people's driving that will cause an accident. I wish I could relax more in a car but after being in 3 accidents (only one my fault) and one that has caused me YEARS (and probably a lifetime) of migraines and twisted vertebraes, I think I should be entitled to be somewhat fearful!

9. Another child. Now don't get me wrong. I WANT another baby! I really really want one. I am just fearful I won't be able to juggle two. I also can't imagine being so uncomfortable in the last month of pregnancy and Emily needing me to carry her around. When I was pregnant with Emily, the last month was PURE hell. My feet were SO swollen, she never ever dropped, and I was on bedrest. I fear if I am pregnant again, how will I take care of Emily if I am on bedrest with swollen feet, high blood pressure and a baby that won't move down?!? I fear that the new child will take up all my time and poor Emily will feel left out. I fear that I wouldn't be able to handle two. Moms do it every day, but I fear that maybe I won't be good at it???
That's me at almost 39 weeks preggers!

10. Baby Food and Crawling. Not that I fear those for myself, but I fear that the munchkin will never want to eat normal food and that she will go off to college with a jar of baby food, crawling into her dorm! She's 13 months and is just BARELY starting to self-feed. If it were up to her, she'd never do it. She will now take one tiny baby-sized bite (pun intended) of something we are eating and then that is it. She will sometimes pick something up, "put" it in her mouth, chew and then smile at us. Only to still see the tiny piece of food still stuck to her hand. She is also walking now, she just doesn't know it. Today I was walking with her and let her only grab my pinky finger. She BARELY had a hold of it and was walking. But to her, she's walking with help. I really hope she tackles these two milestones pretty soon! I know she will when she is ready but I fear, like I said, she'll be crawling off to her dorm room with jars of baby food!